Thursday, August 26, 2010

Mommy's Little Helper....

    We recently brought out Sky's table and chairs so that she could sit at it like a big girl and eat. We eat our dinners at the table as a family and then breakfast and lunch Sky eats at her table. Lately I have been letting her sit there and eat yogurt or applesauce with a spoon as a snack.
      So while Sky was eating her yogurt I was dusting. (ok, I know this story already is starting to sound like a tall tale but I really was dusting) Normally after snacktime we have to do a big cleanup but Sky came running over to help mommy and she was relatively yogurt free so I let her help. She was so cute watching me intently and doing everything exactly as I was. I gave her a baby wipe and told her to clean the end table while I did the tv. We were singing our cleanup song and cleaning away. Sky came running over with the wipe and wanted me to put some of the pledge on it. I told her "no ma'am you cant have any pledge" I gave her a new wipe and told her to go clean her toys. She is very happy with the new wipe and runs off singing. I am in the zone, dancing to my music and cleaning. I hear Sky behind me and glance back  to see her wiping the end table. I just smile at my angel, she's so darn cute! She runs off again and I can hear her through the monitor singing the cleanup song in her bedroom.
     I am done with the living room I turn around to go start another room and I see it. THE END TABLE IS COVERED IN PINK YOGURT!!!  (I definitely did not lose Sky this time all I had to do was follow the slimy pink trail till I got to her.) There was some on the walls, the door handles, pretty much everywhere you could think of that was in Skylar's reach was pink. I go into her room and there she is, standing by her toybox. She holds up the rag, pours some yogurt on it, then sings the cleanup song as she wipes the rag back and forth!!! I am in shock, speechless (thats a big feat for a blabbermouth like me). I say" Sky what are you doing?!"  She proudly points to all the places she's cleaned up and says "yay!" and claps her hand after everyone. Then she grabs her yogurt and her rag and starts to sing.
      I am apalled and proud all at the same time. I decided this time to put her in her highchair with a popsicle (her reward for such hard work) and sit her in front of the tv while I deyogurted the place!

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Do you hear what I hear?

       Let me start out by saying it was a pretty eventful weekend. (lots of shopping, running around, Sky was sick then busted her head, etc) I had lots of things to talk about but nothing that seemed really interesting or funny. I should've known Skylar would end up providing fodder for my blog!!
      First off, I am extremely hard of hearing. I am not so deaf that you can yell obscenities in my ear (like my dad, not that we do that or anything) but I am hard of hearing to the point that if a serial killer was in my house chanting some scary song I would run smack into him because I cant really tell where sound is coming from. I also struggle to distinguish one sound from another. When Sky was a baby the cat would meow and I'd  hear it on the monitor and I'd jump up to go feed Sky. (luckily my eyesight is good so I don't have any embarassing "I breastfed the cat" stories to tell!!!)
      Andrew was cooking and I was going to get  my camera to go take a picture of the sunroom (we rearranged furniture today). I grab my camera and I hear a funny sound. I was like "is that water?" Then I quickly decided my ears were failing me as usual and it must be static or maybe just the sound of Andrew cooking burgers. (we keep bathroom doors closed so running water didn't seem viable) I notice as I go to the kitchen that the sound is getting quieter which means it isn't coming from there. (I know my intellectual prowess is ASTOUNDING!!!) So then I start cataloguing her toys in my mind trying to figure out what makes the water sound as I make my way to her bedroom. I get in there and Skylar isn't there. (don't worry I have learned my lesson and didn't even attempt to look for her in diaper bags or couch cushions!) I realize then that I do hear running water and I scurry into the bathroom hall area.
      There she was. Laying in the sink, chillin' with the water turned on!!! I jumped over to feel the water to check  the temp while I am yelling for Andrew to come see Skylar's latest escapade. The water was warm (which is a little scary because she had the cold AND the hot water on). I still had my camera in my hand so I took a quick snapshot and then turned the water off. Before I can even grab Skylar she is trying to turn them back on. I put her on the floor (that's a total understatement, really I picked her up and held on for dear life while she wiggled and screamed and reached for the sink. Then I just kind of  plopped her on the floor so she could continue her glorious temper tantrum) I move the stack of pillows (Sky's makeshift ladder) that I had left on the floor while we were moving beds and cleaned up the water that was ALL over the sink. Skylar then hung from the counter raising her chubby little leg and grunting while she valiantly tried to get back into her homemade hotub!
      Good news, Sky gave us a laugh and surprised us again. Bad news, she totally could've scalded herself and it could have been a scary event instead of a funny one!! Thank you lord for watching over my little one....

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Killer Kouch Kushions!!

   First off I feel the need to make a statement about my parenting; yes Andrew and I are huge horror fans, but we do not watch any horror movies till after Skylar is in bed and we NEVER purposefully scare her. I can proudly say despite our strides to not bring horror into her life she takes any toy that can open and close (like her pearly pink Disney Princess purse) and says "RAWR, RAWR" and pretends its eating her face. ( I know I am just busting at the seams with pride!) She also squats down on her chubby legs, peers into the ac vent, growls and then screams and runs. ( Cute right?! Or maybe there's a freakin' monster in there, I give it a wide berth when I walk around just in case my daughter has some special spidey sense or something)
     Some fears are healthy, well if not healthy at least cute enough to not tamper with, but Sky's latest phobia had to be dealt with. Sky used to love to lay behind you on the couch and run across the couch from end to end. One day she dropped her little ball and reached down into the couch cushion to get it but ended up just getting upset and throwing one of her not so cute tantrums. I gave her the ball and she looked around me suspiciously at the couch and ran off. This is where I think the fear started. Over the next week Sky  would sit in your lap but not on the back of the couch. I tried to show her once that it was safe by sticking my arm down int he cushion and saying "see, its okay". Skylar bolted, seriously, all I saw was a blur of color and then she was gone. In retrospect,maybe having the couchmonster eat my hand in front of her wasn't the smartest idea.  I went and found her in the tent and showed her mommy's hand and arm were ok and then we read books and all was well.
      Today Skylar was standing in front of the couch, leaning forward on her tiptoes, saying "Spaghettios, spaghettios" while looking at the couch in trepidation. (Don't ask me where the "uhoh's went, she has been lazy lately and now just says spaghettio's). I decided I had to do an intervention. I went and removed the couch cushion while explaining "there's nothing here that will hurt you" and then I turn see a quick flash of color but nothing else. (Seriously, it was crazy. Her sippycup and pillow were on the floor where she was standing but she was gone, it looked like she'd vanished.) I am debating on what to do. I figured I'd kill 2 birds with 1 stone. Skylar LOVES the vacuum (she comes running everytime I turn it on) and well to be honest, there was enough food and debris under the couch cushion to feed a 3rd world country! So I get out the vacuum and sure enough Sky comes running. I sing the cleanup song (you should've heard me it was so beautiful it would've brought a tear to your eye) and take off all the cushions and vacuum. Then I get babydolls and we (me and the babydolls) sit on the couch and lay on the couch. Finally Sky joined us and after some judicous exploring decided the couch was safe. So we put the couch cushions back on and I sat down to watch some tv. I was feeling very proud of myself and ready to relax. (Hey, I have a big couch there was a LOT to vacuum!) Then Sky gets on the couch and pushes me forward so she can lay behind me and kick my back repeatedly.....why did I not want her afraid of the killer couch cushions again?

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

The Great Potty Predicament....

    We have "loosely" begun potty training. We purchased a "Royal Potty" that sings when you pee or poop in it.  I know, I am a little jealous myself. I don't get any acknowledgement when I accomplish either of these feats much less get serenaded. So we let  Sky hang around naked in the mornings and before bedtime in the hopes that she will use the potty. We also have been teaching her to pull her pants up and down, and we get to have all kinds of discussions about peepee or poopoo. I even brought her in once when Andrew was doing his business to show her he was going poopoo in the big potty, (don't tell him I told you or he'll kill me)!! Who knew the day would come that I would be hoping for Sky to start peeing in the middle of the living room. I am convinced if she pees and I grab her and put her on the potty she will totally get the potty thing.
      As Sky gets to be a bigger girl we try to teach her different things, one thing we've been working on is imagination play. We feed our baby dolls, diaper them, put them to sleep and love them. So, this morning Sky is naked and will only sit on the potty for a second. Then I have a genius idea! I grab her cabbage patch and talk about how she is a big girl now and not a baby. I pull the doll's diaper off and sit her on the potty chair. I had tried this once before but Sky didn't really notice. This time she is watching and goes and grabs the doll. I am asking Sky "do you want to use the potty like a big girl?" Sky grabs her babydoll, squats down and starts to diaper her baby. I am sitting there unsure what to say or do, is this a potty protest? or is my little girl just playing Mommy? So, I say "yay! baby's done going potty and now its time to put her diaper on " Skylar stands up, claps her hands and runs off with her babydoll. That's when I notice the wet spot where Sky was squatting...Dammit!

Clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere....

    Yuck!! I am in Skylar's room and something reeks! I look around and its one of the few times the room is clean so I cant imagine what could be hiding. So I go to the toybox and the smell gets stronger! It was definitely the source of the stench. Milk had found its way to the bottom and was curdled and disgusting. So I empty ALL of the toys out. I decide to clean all of the toys and then I will tackle the offending toybox. Sky is having a snack  in her boosterchair so I sit on the floor and get to work bleaching and disinfecting a massive amount of toys. Andrew is going to run some errands so he brings Sky in the room and  puts her on the other side of the room so she can read books while I finish up. I have finally cleaned all the toys and go to get some more cleaning stuff for the actual culprit, the toybox.  I peek at Sky, she is sitting in her chair "reading" her books. So I am in the kitchen and I hear Sky through the monitor. Aww, my sweet girl is singing! I start humming along, its the cleanup song! "Cleanup, cleanup, everybody everywhere, cleanup, cleanup Skylar better do her share". WAIT!! Oh crap she's singing the cleanup song!! I jumpover the gate (I promise it didn't look like a blob hurdling herself over but more like a ballerina gracefully leaping) and I run to Sky's room. There she is, looking up at me with pride shining from her face, clapping her hands and saying "Yay!!" All the toys are back in the milkcurdled toybox!!! Isn't it funny how the lessons we teach seem to take at the wrong times!


    Yes we call Sky the Skylarmonster! I SO wish I could say its one of those ironic nicknames, like when you call a fat man "Tiny" but its just not so. I love my daughter, her smiles are full of sunshine and when she hugs you its like God is smiling down on you. That being said, her nickname is right on...she's a monster! We had one of those days recently where nothing we could do would soothe the savage beast.

     First I need to give you some background info. Skylar has a small problem with throwing. "Small" as in she has cost some poor innocent his toenail, made a 12 year old boy cry, broke my cellphone, a coke glass, and well, the list could go on forever. We have been aggressively treating this problem with hand spanks,butt spanks, firm no's and scary faces. Its lessened but its still an issue. We went to a new church last Sunday and left Sky in the nursery for the first time. We informed the lady of the throwing problem. So after a great sermon we leave the auditorium and as soon as we enter the hallway we hear it, angry screams resonating through the halls. We look at each other and Andrew says "that's our monster". We get to her room and see about 5 kids playing and smiling and there's our little angel (that's an ironic nickname) in her pretty dress and sparkly shoes and cute little pigtails, sitting in a chair facing the corner all red faced and angry. We were then informed Sky spent almost the whole time in timeout due to her throwing. The upside to this is Sky didn't throw anything for 3 days. We decided to implement timeouts into our discipline regimen.

        Timeouts are awesome! Sky hates them she cries and sobs and as soon as you let her out she says "YAY" hugs you and runs off to play. So now we are at the day I referred to earlier. Skylar was doing bad things all day to get my attention so we had been doing hand spanks and timeouts like crazy. So we are playing and she is being nasty so I tell her I am not going to play with her still she starts to play nice again and I proceed to ignore her bad behavior. Sky then decides to touch the TV, the one thing she knows will not get ignored. I said "Skylar Renee!! No Ma'am" and I stood up, Sky looked at me all wide eyed and guilty and touched the TV then sat down and shoved her hands under her legs so I couldn't spank them!! (I of course did what your never supposed to do and cracked up) so she totally won that one!

      So, as the day continues Skylar continues to be as bad as she possibly could. So I turn the chair around (that's the universal sign for timeout)and on cue Sky starts to cry. I put her in timeout and tell her "no ma'am we do not throw" then I ran to the restroom real quick. I come out and Sky is standing next to her timeout chair. She has that deer in the headlights look. This is where it gets crazy. Sky doesn't know what to do she is busted and she knows it. She starts to get back in the chair then quickly changes course and runs (again with the flailing arms and frantic screams). She looked so damn cute, I totally wanted to let her go but then I would pay for it every time I try to put her in timeout so I sighed and went looking for her. She was missing!!! I am calling her name and looking everywhere and again I am desperate and looking in diaper bags, and couch cushions and the most insane places. So by this time I am mad and annoyed and over the whole thing. I stand in the hall by Sky's room and  say "Skylar Renee come out right now, I am not kidding" I hear the saddest little sobs and she sticks her head out (from under the crib) and says "no, no, no,no and is spanking her leg" My heart broke poor little thing was punishing herself more than I probably could. (as sad as it was, I wont lie, I am hoping this whole "punish myself more than my parents can punish me" thing sticks) So, I put her in the timeout chair and we had a talk about how we cant throw things and we cant run from time out and she hugged me and kissed me and said yay and ran off to reak havoc elsewhere!



Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Pillow Fight

     Skylar loves pillows. She is very passionate about it, if she sees you laying on one she comes and grabs your shoulder and tries to pull you off the pillow while she yells incoherently. Apparently they ALL belong to her. She has little skylarsized pillows that she carries around because sometimes the bigger pillows are s a challenge for her.  She always looks so cute stumbling around while carrying a big pillow. Usually you just see a pillow with chunky little legs sticking out underneath it. Good news is when she trips and lands on her face at least its a soft landing! (my clumsy self has actually considered carrying around a pillow for just such moments.)
     So Sky was playing in her room.  Her window is her new favorite place. She likes to bury herself under pillows and clothes in the window and "read" her books. So today I hear the distress call "aaagghh momma momma aaaggghhhh!!!!" I would love to embellish and tell you I leapt up from my seat dove over the couch and raced  to save my child all mamma bear like, but that wasn't the case. I hear the distress call about 30 times a day so it doesn't inspire any "supermom" alter ego to surface.  I finished rinsing the last of the dishes then went to see what life threatening situation my monster had got herself into. By the time I got there she was almost out of her  predicament.  Pretty much the issue was she was buried under pillows and couldn't get out of  the window because she wasn't willing to relinquish the book she was holding so her hands would be free.
        So after I help her out I grab a pillow and say "pillow fight!" and knock her over. (we have these pillow fights often!) She giggles and screams and frantically tries to get a big pillow to hit momma with. She is falling down and all crazy and frenzied so I grab her arms to help her lift the pillow. I remember thinking "Huh, that was a heavy pillow..." when WHAM!! Sky smacks me across the face with the pillow. I screamed and  stumbled back into the wall! I was in so much pain! I hear Sky giggling in the background and I am trying hard to not cry. I go to see what the hell hit me and Sky looks at my face and goes "uhoh....spaghettios"  She had stuffed a bunch of books in the pillowcase!! Sky touches my face and there is blood on her hands. She whacked me good! She did hug me though then ran off to play. She seemed oblivious but I swear I heard some diabolical laughter coming from the bedroom and I was set up!! Sky wins again!

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Out of the mouths of babes....

    Skylar is getting bigger everyday and I am always amazed at how quickly she learns new skills! She is very vocal, just not in the way I had necessarily expected her to be. By this I mean she doesn't necessarily use words in the English language as much as she babbles and screams at the top of her lungs. Lately though she has begun using  her words more and. more. Andrew and I love how she makes animal sounds. You can ask her what a froggy says and she says "ibbit,ibbit" A duck says "quackquack", a cat says "meyaw", a sheep says"baaaa" and so forth. She also does this totally cute thing where if you ask her "what does Grandpa (or Grandma, or daddy, or mama) say?" she points her finger and says "No,no,no,no".  I know, its freakin' adorable!!
     SO we are in the van the other day and Sky is getting restless and fussy so we are singing songs and going through our animal sounds. She is so on top of her game, doing every animal sound correctly, when I say.... "What does Mommy say?" and my sweet little daughter, without a seconds hesitation,  replied "moooo" and then snorted like a pig!! Andrew of course laughs hysterically which makes Skylar keep snorting over and over again and saying "Mooooooo".

I'm thinking its time to go on a diet.

 (Andrew by the way hasn't stopped laughing and loves to recant the story to me lest I forget!)


     Lately my little monster has been hiding when she doesn't agree with whatever I have planned for her (which is quite often). I use the term "hiding" quite loosely, it usually consist of her ducking her head or standing against a wall in plain view while trying to make herself as flat as possible. Luckily so far she has always been easy to "find". Tonight however as I prepared her crib for bedtime (I currently have to move it to the middle of the room so she doesn't pull her Spiderwoman routine and scale the walls to get out) she saw me and ran out of the room. It was a very frantic run accompanied with squeals, giggles and flailing arms. I, being a great Toddler Interpreter, knew this was the lead in to a game of hide-N-seek. Since I am always the victor in this game I had no worries.
     15 minutes later you find me standing in the foyer scratching my head, my cocky smile no longer on my face, calling Skylar's name while wondering if it was possible she was kidnapped or mistaken for a kitty treat by Duchess. (ok so that was reaching a bit but if you were missing a small child and saw Duchess licking her chops with her gluttonous belly hanging out in all its glory you would have leapt to that conclusion too, rational or not.) I seriously had NO clue as to where she was, I had checked all the obvious places and was now looking in places that made absolutely no sense (under couch cushions, in the diaper bag, etc) Then I hear it, a giggle, and right there in front of me her little head peeks out!!! She was hiding behind her tent! I know, I know, it sounds like I dropped the ball on the whole seeking thing but really I didn't, there's a plant behind the tent!! Sky was sitting on the base of the plant with her arms and legs wrapped around the plant and she is giggling incessantly! The scores were in: Mommy 0 Skylar 1, I am no longer the Hide-N-Seek champion!! SO next time my little imp goes running I will frantically follow close behind, my arms flailing!!