Wednesday, August 11, 2010


    Yes we call Sky the Skylarmonster! I SO wish I could say its one of those ironic nicknames, like when you call a fat man "Tiny" but its just not so. I love my daughter, her smiles are full of sunshine and when she hugs you its like God is smiling down on you. That being said, her nickname is right on...she's a monster! We had one of those days recently where nothing we could do would soothe the savage beast.

     First I need to give you some background info. Skylar has a small problem with throwing. "Small" as in she has cost some poor innocent his toenail, made a 12 year old boy cry, broke my cellphone, a coke glass, and well, the list could go on forever. We have been aggressively treating this problem with hand spanks,butt spanks, firm no's and scary faces. Its lessened but its still an issue. We went to a new church last Sunday and left Sky in the nursery for the first time. We informed the lady of the throwing problem. So after a great sermon we leave the auditorium and as soon as we enter the hallway we hear it, angry screams resonating through the halls. We look at each other and Andrew says "that's our monster". We get to her room and see about 5 kids playing and smiling and there's our little angel (that's an ironic nickname) in her pretty dress and sparkly shoes and cute little pigtails, sitting in a chair facing the corner all red faced and angry. We were then informed Sky spent almost the whole time in timeout due to her throwing. The upside to this is Sky didn't throw anything for 3 days. We decided to implement timeouts into our discipline regimen.

        Timeouts are awesome! Sky hates them she cries and sobs and as soon as you let her out she says "YAY" hugs you and runs off to play. So now we are at the day I referred to earlier. Skylar was doing bad things all day to get my attention so we had been doing hand spanks and timeouts like crazy. So we are playing and she is being nasty so I tell her I am not going to play with her still she starts to play nice again and I proceed to ignore her bad behavior. Sky then decides to touch the TV, the one thing she knows will not get ignored. I said "Skylar Renee!! No Ma'am" and I stood up, Sky looked at me all wide eyed and guilty and touched the TV then sat down and shoved her hands under her legs so I couldn't spank them!! (I of course did what your never supposed to do and cracked up) so she totally won that one!

      So, as the day continues Skylar continues to be as bad as she possibly could. So I turn the chair around (that's the universal sign for timeout)and on cue Sky starts to cry. I put her in timeout and tell her "no ma'am we do not throw" then I ran to the restroom real quick. I come out and Sky is standing next to her timeout chair. She has that deer in the headlights look. This is where it gets crazy. Sky doesn't know what to do she is busted and she knows it. She starts to get back in the chair then quickly changes course and runs (again with the flailing arms and frantic screams). She looked so damn cute, I totally wanted to let her go but then I would pay for it every time I try to put her in timeout so I sighed and went looking for her. She was missing!!! I am calling her name and looking everywhere and again I am desperate and looking in diaper bags, and couch cushions and the most insane places. So by this time I am mad and annoyed and over the whole thing. I stand in the hall by Sky's room and  say "Skylar Renee come out right now, I am not kidding" I hear the saddest little sobs and she sticks her head out (from under the crib) and says "no, no, no,no and is spanking her leg" My heart broke poor little thing was punishing herself more than I probably could. (as sad as it was, I wont lie, I am hoping this whole "punish myself more than my parents can punish me" thing sticks) So, I put her in the timeout chair and we had a talk about how we cant throw things and we cant run from time out and she hugged me and kissed me and said yay and ran off to reak havoc elsewhere!



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